Truth B. Told: An Honest University Student Resume
second year aysha jerald
Truth B. Told
4 Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey
605-475-6959 truthbtold@what.com
PROFESSIONAL PROFILE
Confused, inexperienced, and easily distracted university student slightly hesitant to contribute to any large, upscale organization. Recently received the Least Likely To Participate In Class Award, with additional honors in Meme Recognition and Binge Watching When I Should’ve Be Reading That Novel For Lit. Facilitator of sarcasm, daydreams, and awkward silences. Firm believer in both everything and nothing at all.
OBJECTIVE
I wish to be as frank as possible about who I am. There is no professional demeanor that I have prepared. No elevator speech that I have rehearsed. No flawless syntax that I have to boast. There is only this honest response, bare and unmasked for your consideration.
EDUCATION
University of Home Sweet Home
Bachelor of Common Sense degree expected in near future.
Major: Goofball
Minor: Procrastinator
GPA: That’s funny.
EXPERIENCE
I have had the experience working with the following organizations:
Microsoft Designer and Technical Supervisor Middle School-Present
Created several PowerPoint presentations
Drafted multiple Word documents
Recently begun work within Excel sheets
SnapChat Daily Coordinator High School-Present
Coordinated various daily posts via. application
Gained efficiency in nonchalant design
Ubisoft Just Dance Practitioner Birth-Present
Experienced user of Just Dance software
Specialist in all motions relating to Freestyle and Hip Hop
Uber Navigator and Tracker Since That One Time I Got Lost-Present
STRENGTHS
Interpersonal Communication
Ex: If I’m having a conversation with someone and they say something that I don’t hear, I can pretend like I did by smiling and/or laughing.
Empathy
Ex: Once while I was on a bus, the doors closed before this kid could run inside. Although I didn’t tell the bus driver to stop, I felt real bad for the kid.
Personal Motivation
Ex: My alarm clock is set to the song Power by Kanye West. Despite still missing most of my morning classes, I challenge myself to rise with the chorus every day.
WEAKNESSES
Obliviousness
Ex: My bookbag could be open all day long and I’ll still walk around like royalty.
Taking On Too Much Responsibility
Ex: Last week, I decided to recycle my trash. That was the beginning and the end.
Sensitivity
Ex: I cry everytime I watch Lion King. No joke. Every. Single. Time.
ACTIVITIES
Living My Best Life
Hitting Up That “Good-Good” Cookout At Midnight
Five Hour Power Naps
Dodging Freshman 15 Like A Pro
SUMMARY OF ACCOMPLISHMENTS
Honestly, I do not have a summary of my accomplishments. Granted, that doesn’t mean that I am not an accomplished person. Throughout my life, I’ve laughed, loved, and lived the way I intended too.
Truth be told, I don’t have my life together, and I am by no means perfect. However, that’s what makes me human, and that’s what makes this resume the most authentic and legitimate piece you’ll ever review.
You’re welcome.